I am mother of two girls and grandmother to three grandchildren. When I went to the clinic for my first child. The first thing the sister asked “Do you always sleep with men?” Why do you sleep with men whereas you are disabled? I wondered why this woman is asking me this question as if she is not a woman. What I am trying to say is that there is too much oppression from other the so called normal woman.
They oppressed us a lot more than males. That is why males can rape us, can oppress us and the society is discriminating against us because it is us women teaching other women that women with disabilities are not worth it. I will make an example all of us sitting in a room (some are disabled and some are not). If a normal woman smiles with a handsome guy and flirt it is a good thing. But if it is a disabled person their comment is “Oh laba bantu ba disabled bayawathanda amadoda” (like men).
But both of us are women. If I got kids they will label the men as cruel, God must punish the man who slept with you. Why? Is it because I have a disability? Hence I say those women who are called “normal” are the worst perpetrators when it comes to discrimination against women with disabilities.
Another thing they say is that a lady wears heels and therefore you must wear high heels. Imagine me wearing high heels on my feet – the other one is looking this side and the other one looking up because of my disability.
Now because I cannot wear high heels, I am not woman enough? I cannot wear a short dress, If I am wearing a short dress I will be told that I want men. But when they are wearing a short dress it is hot and natural. Do you think that it is fair? I do not think that it is fair for women with disability. You will find that most of the time even your society in the same street when you want to play with other girls or go out to a night club. The first thing they will ask you why do you go to nightclubs, you also want men? Why do those women go to night clubs, are they looking for men? Why should it be me about men? Why should it be about sex? How do you have sex? How do you do it?
The concept of discrimination is complex, it includes both prejudicial treatment and disadvantages. In order to prevent such treatment and counter disadvantages resulting from particular circumstances, government introduce anti-discrimination laws and preferential treatment or compensatory measures.